Diary of a Socially Inept Hermit: Part 2

Hey Readers!

 Before we begin: It's the Wimbledon finals weekend! Although I'm not a massive sports fan, this weekend has to be one of my favourite weekends of the summer. It's just a giant excuse to get together with friends and family, eat strawberries and cream and watch one the most simple of sports, tennis. However things aren't going away this year. Firstly, one of my friends does not like tennis and is refusing to let me watch it if we gathered at her house, therefore I have decided that Wimbledon is worth more than friends so I am stuck watching it with my family. Secondly, I am rather ill. It's not just hayfever (which is happening simultaneously) but it feels like beavers have climbed into my nose whilst sleeping, built a damn causing my nose to be permanently blocked, as well as a throat that feels like it has been torn to pieces by a bear. Thirdly, the likelihood that anyone will actually buy strawberries and cream is minimal.

 Now that's out of the way: back to the awkwardness that is my life!

Day 2

 After the traumatic experience of the trains the day before, Arawyn and I decided it would be best if we tried the bus. We found one that went via another school, about 5-10 minutes walk from the boys' school. Therefore I tottered up to the bus stop to meet her, only to be greeted with the news "The bus doesn't stop here." My heart sunk. Public transport has failed yet again. But then, a miracle! Two boys who went to the other school walked past our bus stop so we asked them where they got it, only to be told that the public cannot get that bus. Poo. There was a bus that was coming in five minutes that would take us in to the city where the school is, and after a couple of unsuccessful phone calls to parents, we decided we would have to get it and be late.

 Little known to us, that bus didn't stop at any of the villages on the way, so we managed to get to the city centre about twenty minutes before school starts. It was a miracle! And then right next to us was a bus going to the boys' school! Yet another miracle! With something finally going our way in regards to public transport, we walked over to the bus and it pulled away. Without us. We were a second too late and it had already started reversing. I hope you feel my pain. In a panic, we managed to get on the girls' school equivalent and thanks to some very helpful year 9s, we did managed to get into school fifteen minutes late.     

 Neither of us had a subject in Block E of our timetable, therefore we had to gather in the hall and embark on some 'bonding activities'. What fun. We had to do the standard activities of getting yourself in date of birth order without talking, and the human knot. The second one failed in a painful muddle of hilarity and swearing. The latter of which mainly came from me.

 Now we all bonded and chummy (I couldn't even remember people's names) we skipped off to our next lesson, which for me was English. We were doing the beginning of Othello, and after GCSE English, it was such a relief to finally have a good English lesson. The lesson started, as all good lessons do, with a conspiracy connecting Shakespeare and the King James Bible. Shakespeare was 46 when the King James Bible was published. And in the 46th Psalm, the 46th word in is 'Shake' and the 46th word from the end in is 'Spear'. Coincidence? Then we moved on the actual text, which I was not aware of was full of so many sex jokes. Now I read a lot of Shakespeare, I know the type of things that come up. But really. The enjoyment of this was added to by one of the guys in my class, N, was German and completely missed the references.

  Then I had my second and final maths lesson, which was the one of the dullest things I have had to sit through in my life. We were doing the mechanics component of the maths A-level, the SUVAT Equations to be specific. The maths itself was actually very interesting but oh dear Lord it was dull. Like people almost falling asleep dull. However it was rather easy, and although I could have answered most of the questions, as a general rule I don't as to not to annoy people, but I in one instance I had looked on ahead, and after a bit of thinking realised that the difference of two squares was going to come up, so when that stage had been reached I said "v squared minus u squared". Clearly this had impressed my teacher who asked for my name and told me how fantastic I was for being able to recognise that instantly. Yes... That is what I had done. But then, one of the boys in the back row said "That's the girl I was telling you about", then there was more sniggering/muttering, finished with the phrase "She's going to be a challenge." Oh Lord in heaven I was angry. Not least because I felt I had been labeled as a conquest but also I HAD NEVER SEEN THESE PEOPLE IN MY LIFE. HOW THE HELL CAN THEY BE TALKING ABOUT ME? Ok, they probably were in some other classes of mine, but I hadn't noticed them, and if I wasn't so polite and not entirely sure if they had actually said that, I would have given them something to talk about. In that I would be angry. Not anything else you cheeky monkeys ;)

 Before lunch all the external students had a meeting in the common room about life as an external student in the school, which was pretty standard. But then *insert baby voice* the boys girls had to be in different rooms so we don't hear about the secrets of the opposite sex. It was as you would imagine: if you're on your period, you're just going to have to get on with it (which I was rather dismayed at after reading this), don't wear short skirts (year 8s learn to gather at the bottom of the stairs) and don't be put off by how guys eat. Despite the patronising undertones of sexism, it was a rather amusing talk.

 The boys then filed back in and we all started on lunch. I was in a group with Arawyn, A, F and N, however we were next to a group of internal guys. One of these boys, by the looks of it, did want to sit with some of the mystical creatures that we are as girls, however was too nervous to leave the safety and comfort of the manly men, so ended up with his body facing us, and his neck twisted around to talk to his friends. It all looked rather awkward and painful.

 I finished with yet another awkward tutor group (externals clearly to manly [terrified] to mix with us vagina holders), and a very dull chemistry lesson.

 Going home, we once again became victim of the public transport, but you don't want to hear about that again. 

Gwendolen